Saturday, February 14, 2009

Valentine's Day - Whatever!

Here is how my Valentine's Day went. We got up and prepared to go to Wal-Mart. I had just nursed Joshua so his belly should have been full, well he said otherwise. He was crying so I fed him a small bottle on the way to Wal-Mart. When we got there and the bottle was empty he was still crying so I attempted to nurse him in the front seat of the car. I couldn't get him latched. I didn't have my nipple shield and he was screaming. I had to hand express some into his mouth for him to finally take it. He fell asleep after a few minutes so I suspect he wasn't really hungry. I pulled him off and he woke up and then started screaming. I couldn't get him latched back on. So we decided to leave.

He was fine in the car on the way home but I was afraid he would start crying in the store with us having a cart full of groceries and getting dirty looks from people. We came home and he started fussing so I fed him. He then slept for 4 hours! He woke up and was fed and then went back to sleep.

We went out to dinner, IHOP, while we were there he started fussing so we fed him a bottle. He didn't finish it, had some in the car but still didn't finish it by the time we got back to Wal-Mart (we had to go to get my prescription). We had to finish feeding him the bottle in the store. Even when he finished it he was still fussing. He wanted to be carried around Wal-Mart. So Jamie had to carry him around the store until we were just about done.

We came home and I got in the shower. Joshua started crying while I was in the shower acting like he was hungry. I had just fed him before I got in the shower. I fed him some when I got out but then he started screaming while I was trying to feed him so he wasn't hungry. I was so tired by this point in the day, it had already been a very long one. I just broke down in tears and Jamie took Joshua walking around the house. Apparently he burped like 8 times. He was finally able to put him down in his chair and he played for a bit before going to sleep.

During the last time when he was screaming and wouldn't nurse I was quite upset. Jamie accused me of making Joshua upset. So of course that made me more upset, something he doesn't seem to understand. He thinks he can somehow help me realize how I am acting and then maybe I won't act that way anymore. Yeah, right. First, even if I had the kind of personality that was relaxed in stressful situations I wouldn't expect to be that way when my baby is crying or screaming. Since I don't have that kind of personality I am going to be more stressed out when the baby is stressed. While I do realize this doesn't help the situation it's not like I can change my personality overnight or anything and by the time I did change it he would probably be out of this phase anyway. Oh well. I'm just glad the day is over. I'm going to bed. BTW, those are his baby legs he's wearing in the picture. Check out their website to learn more about them.

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